When Erik and I were in Costa Rica, we met a young guy from France who was working at our hotel for the semester. We asked him about the rainy season and he referred to that time period as ‘sad days.’ He seemed much more optimistic and happier about the transition into the dry season. We thought it was so endearing, so now every time we talk about the weather or other life events, we often use the terms ‘sad days’ and ‘happy days’ in an accent. Now you know the inside joke too.
Anyways, the idea of remembering the hard [sad] days to appreciate the present has been on my mind recently. I had some hard days over the last month. I’m kind of over the bumps in the road now, but I still wanted to share this message. Writing helps me process things much more clearly, and I hope that maybe some of this can help you too.
First, let me start by saying that I do not have a hard life, but I do have hard days.
This topic has two-fold meaning for me. Personally, I need to take a moment to remember the hard days when I start feeling bad about the things I haven’t accomplished yet. Secondly, I need to remember the hard days to help you.
Here’s what this looks like for me.
When I feel guilty about my finances, I need to remember the hard days when I went to check my brake lights at Auto Zone and also asked them check my alternator. You know, just in case. After finding out my alternator was failing, I took my car to the shop the week before a styled photoshoot. Instead of my Jeep, I then had a little Toyota Corolla rental car to pack everything up in. When I got my car back with a fixed alternator, the brake lights were still not working. So I drove home (very carefully), got a ride to buy fuses and a brake switch, but neither one of those fixed the problem. So my car was basically out of commission for a couple weeks. A now couple hundred dollars later, my car is (mostly) in the clear.
When I feel guilty about about not being further along in this business, I need to remember the hard days when I tried and failed. I cannot discount each little step it took me to get here. I recently started a new mentoring program and one of my goals was to publish an updated client contact form on my website. Actually, this has been a goal for awhile, and I felt guilty because it just hadn’t happened.
However, as I started working on it, I remembered that I actually had tried to do this before. I forgot that I had run into obstacles with the tech side of things. The back end of my website wasn’t cooperating, so eventually I gave up and just left my email and phone number on the contact page. I had to take a step back, but now it’s up and running! (Go check it out and send me a message!) I know this story seems simple, but things like this happen all the time. They really add up to huge time sucks sometimes, but they’re all part of the process.
I had so much to learn, and that takes time. You guys, I worked for almost three years in a job that was not getting me closer to my goals, so I got a job at a hotel part-time on the weekends to learn more about weddings and catering. After that didn’t lead to a full-time position, about two months later I got my current position as an Event Coordinator, which was such an answered prayer. Around that same time, I joined an amazing mentorship program and learned how to build a website and blog from the ground up. And this year, I learned how to build a business from the ground up. (Read here for more encouragement about taking your life seasons in stride.)
I have so much more to tell you about that entire journey, but those are the cliff notes. That being said, I also need to remember the fact that I work full-time outside of this business. Not to say this is a bad thing, but I need to admit it comes with challenges and recognize that’s okay.
Here’s why this is important for you.
I don’t want you to look at me and think this has just been easy. That it’s different for me, that I’m just more brave, or that I’m just better at this whole thing. Cause I’m not. Trust me. You need and deserve to know the truth and what it took me to get here.
I still have hard days and times when I’m being lazy on the couch watching The Bachelorette instead of writing blog posts. I still have days where it’s hard for me to reach out to potential clients and put myself out there. I’m still shy about really telling people what it is I do. I still have days where I feel completely overwhelmed and so behind on my to-do list. So I’m going to keep telling you about the hard days and honestly, I’m an open book if there’s anything more you want to know about starting a business.
When you start wondering why your finances aren’t better, or why you haven’t gotten as far as you would like in your business, or why you can’t get past a mental block to finish that reoccurring to-do list, remember the hard days. They are an important part of your story. There are probably a lot of reasons and experiences that have gotten you to right where you are. Fix the things you can, forget the things you can’t, and tend to your relationships more often than your to-dos. Your people will get you through the rest.
Remember the hard days, and be thankful for them. Even on the ‘sad days,’ I had a thousand reasons to be grateful for the things that were hard.
What are some hard days that you have been thankful for? What goals are you working towards, and how can I help you reach them? Tell me in the comments or feel free to message me!